Today is the first day of 2009, and so many things happened to me in the past year, some sad, some crazy, and some in the middle. I'm listing them down here. I'm not putting any dates, since I'm somehow bad with them!
* 2008 was my second year as a college instructor. I'm enjoying what I am doing and if the future permits, I might stay like that for a little longer. I don't expect to be a teacher all my life though.
* I became the coordinator for Humanities 1 last year. Not an easy job for someone who has four subjects to teach in a row.
* I ditched the one whom I used to consider as the love of my life and had another relationship with a friend. I'll admit it wasn't easy but I pulled through. My friend-turned significant other and I were supposed to get tied last month, but because of some constraints, it didn't happen. Now I'm just keeping mum and keeping his and my fingers crossed that it will take place this year, God willing.
* Connected to the point above, I exercised my privilege of choice and declared to my father that someone was interested in me. His reaction? "Sweetie, if he's the one, and if he really is for you, I can do nothing about that. Cross the bridge."
* I lost some weight during, of all seasons, Ramadan. Was it indifference towards food? or stress from work? Maybe both.
* I finally got a reputation as a "class record terrorist" among the students. Which means I am nice in the classroom but the college kids don't know that I'm taking note of their moves. They know, though, that I am merciless when it comes to grades. I don't give perfect grades unless the kid's got what it takes, really.
* I got "very satisfactory" ratings on the Teacher Evaluation Ratings. According to the boss, "not bad for someone who got in two years ago."
* In 2008 I finally got my own laptop and internet connection, and I'm having a blast!
* For the first time in 12 years I finally got to visit my Catholic maternal grandmother and other relatives. I wish I could see them more often.
* I cultivated more friendships last year. Proof that I wasn't the cold fish or the ice queen they thought me to be.
* I believe I was more in charge of my own life last year more than ever before.
* On a more bitter point, my attempts at being outspoken on what's happening around here were met with opposition. Hmmmm so they say I'm bringing my ethnic group in a bad light and I should always defend them. I'm sorry but such an attitude goes against my principle that it's not a question of what race, nationality, or tribe that counts, it's whether the person did right or wrong in the eyes of God (I'm not including man here because he himself is not infallible). Even if the person in question is a relative of mine, I'd say, "ok, you did something wrong and I'm not judging you to the max, but you have to be responsible for your actions." I'm channeling my thoughts through this blog nowadays so that at least I can rant and rave whatever it is I want to complain against.
* 2008 was the year that I perhaps posted more things in this blog. To add to that, I tried out mobile blogging as well. I also blog hopped a lot and I made some friends in the blogosphere. Dottson (your blog is defunct now, I know), Hning, M.Zedan, Ren_crow, Baby Pink, Ammaro, Pan, and to others I didn't mention, thanks for making my blog experiences complete with your comments and e-mails. A big kiss and a hug to all of you! Here's to more blog posts in 2009!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
The World's Gone Mad...
This national news article got my attention: a cabinet member's son beat up a 14 year old boy at a golf course because he was playing too slow!
The news stirred up a hornet's nest because of the following:
1. The cabinet member and his son are identified as Muslims from a prominent family where I live;
2. The boy's family was Christian, obviously;
3. The son happened to be the mayor of his own hometown;
4. The father and son had the nerve to file a libel case against the boy's family because the event figured on national TV.
The mainstream press certainly had a ball over the "Muslim" tag. I've seen many misinformed and ignorant as well as racist people fuel the fire over what's happened. Muslims in my country get a deal of bad hype among other things, and I'll explain why later.
Like I always tell those who post in offensive comments in forums and blogs, generalizing is not the way to go. Just because somebody is known to be Muslim doesn't mean that he's a potential criminal. Then Islam and any religion for that matter should't be brought into the picture. My non-Muslim friends and colleagues would sometimes ask me why is my ethnic group behaving like that (i.e., violating laws,dealing drugs,feeling as if they own the world, etc. etc.) I tell them to avoid the term "Muslim" and suggest that they use the name of my ethnic group instead. I also tell my students and other people who belong to the same ethnic group never to interchange "Islam" and "Muslim" with their ethnic group name because instead of solving the problem, they further perpetuate it. So they shouldn't complain when they get irked by "Muslim militants", "Islamic rebels" and all that because they are partly to blame.
I know that there were many Christians in my country who have been stung by what's happened, but then that shouldn't give them excuse to generalize us as group. There are many of us who criticize our own people for having such attitudes and doing what is not right. It just so happens that we're not heard that much. Please be reminded that at least when your own kind commits the same things, they don't get branded as "Christian kidnappers", "Christian rebels," and you know what else.
My two cents' worth on the cabinet member and his son: for God's sake, everyone knows what you've done so don't deny that the kid was beaten up! Just have the kid treated at the hospital at your expense and pay the damages. You've got enough money for that, obviously because it's known now that your playground is a golf course! If you don't want negative publicity, just solve the problem and move on! At least people will know that you know how to make amends. Your threat of a libel suit when it's known that you've beaten the kid up just adds to the image that we as a people are such sore losers! Face the music!
Another two cents' worth for my fellows: ok, so you're pelting me the tomatoes because I didn't defend the two. What they did was a mistake and the fact that they didn't want to own up and resolve the problem is something wrong. I don't care if you ostracize me because of this, at least I know that this is a question of right and wrong and not a question of ethnicity. Stop feeling superior and holier -than -thou, because it's hurt us more than we know. We're to blame too if others don't have a good opinion of us. We're the reasons why others discriminate us. We can't call ourselves Muslims or Christians if we support what's wrong. In other words, we hold the keys. We just don't use them. Sorry if this hurts but truth does hurt, and we will never change for the better unless we first admit that there's something wrong with us as people.
This is perhaps the most stormy post I've ever written, and I have no regrets for posting it. The world has become stranger by the day, and sicker by the second.
The news stirred up a hornet's nest because of the following:
1. The cabinet member and his son are identified as Muslims from a prominent family where I live;
2. The boy's family was Christian, obviously;
3. The son happened to be the mayor of his own hometown;
4. The father and son had the nerve to file a libel case against the boy's family because the event figured on national TV.
The mainstream press certainly had a ball over the "Muslim" tag. I've seen many misinformed and ignorant as well as racist people fuel the fire over what's happened. Muslims in my country get a deal of bad hype among other things, and I'll explain why later.
Like I always tell those who post in offensive comments in forums and blogs, generalizing is not the way to go. Just because somebody is known to be Muslim doesn't mean that he's a potential criminal. Then Islam and any religion for that matter should't be brought into the picture. My non-Muslim friends and colleagues would sometimes ask me why is my ethnic group behaving like that (i.e., violating laws,dealing drugs,feeling as if they own the world, etc. etc.) I tell them to avoid the term "Muslim" and suggest that they use the name of my ethnic group instead. I also tell my students and other people who belong to the same ethnic group never to interchange "Islam" and "Muslim" with their ethnic group name because instead of solving the problem, they further perpetuate it. So they shouldn't complain when they get irked by "Muslim militants", "Islamic rebels" and all that because they are partly to blame.
I know that there were many Christians in my country who have been stung by what's happened, but then that shouldn't give them excuse to generalize us as group. There are many of us who criticize our own people for having such attitudes and doing what is not right. It just so happens that we're not heard that much. Please be reminded that at least when your own kind commits the same things, they don't get branded as "Christian kidnappers", "Christian rebels," and you know what else.
My two cents' worth on the cabinet member and his son: for God's sake, everyone knows what you've done so don't deny that the kid was beaten up! Just have the kid treated at the hospital at your expense and pay the damages. You've got enough money for that, obviously because it's known now that your playground is a golf course! If you don't want negative publicity, just solve the problem and move on! At least people will know that you know how to make amends. Your threat of a libel suit when it's known that you've beaten the kid up just adds to the image that we as a people are such sore losers! Face the music!
Another two cents' worth for my fellows: ok, so you're pelting me the tomatoes because I didn't defend the two. What they did was a mistake and the fact that they didn't want to own up and resolve the problem is something wrong. I don't care if you ostracize me because of this, at least I know that this is a question of right and wrong and not a question of ethnicity. Stop feeling superior and holier -than -thou, because it's hurt us more than we know. We're to blame too if others don't have a good opinion of us. We're the reasons why others discriminate us. We can't call ourselves Muslims or Christians if we support what's wrong. In other words, we hold the keys. We just don't use them. Sorry if this hurts but truth does hurt, and we will never change for the better unless we first admit that there's something wrong with us as people.
This is perhaps the most stormy post I've ever written, and I have no regrets for posting it. The world has become stranger by the day, and sicker by the second.
Friday, December 26, 2008
Before 2008 ends....
To all those who cared for me,
thank you!
To those whom I had pissed off,
I'm sorry but it had to be...
To those who gave me a lot of kicks,hilarious
moments and laughter,
hit me baby one more time!!!!
To those who spread issues about me?
It's ok, I got famous anyway :P
To those who made me cry,
you fellas owe me a talent fee!
To those who had shared their experiences in
life and love, not to mention all the advice given,
I finally felt that I'm not really alone...
To those who have envied me,
EAT YOUR HEARTS OUT!!!!
YOU CAN NEVER BE LIKE ME,HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
And to the ones reading this post and this blog,
You found yourselves a very special place
in this writer's heart :)!
Happy New Year (Muharram 1)!!!
thank you!
To those whom I had pissed off,
I'm sorry but it had to be...
To those who gave me a lot of kicks,hilarious
moments and laughter,
hit me baby one more time!!!!
To those who spread issues about me?
It's ok, I got famous anyway :P
To those who made me cry,
you fellas owe me a talent fee!
To those who had shared their experiences in
life and love, not to mention all the advice given,
I finally felt that I'm not really alone...
To those who have envied me,
EAT YOUR HEARTS OUT!!!!
YOU CAN NEVER BE LIKE ME,HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
And to the ones reading this post and this blog,
You found yourselves a very special place
in this writer's heart :)!
Happy New Year (Muharram 1)!!!
Thursday, December 25, 2008
My "Other" Playlist
I'm busy these days looking for good pieces of classical music for my Humanities classes.
Few people outside of my immediate family know that I listen to classical music. Yeah, right, I mean people with strange names like Mozart and Beethoven and Bach! A lot of people out there might think that this kind of thing is for the old folks, but hey, it's good music, and it's not dead, since a lot of movies and even anime use classical music in their soundtracks.
It can be quite relaxing to listen to after you've been loaded with pop and Rnb and all that. Especially when you find the lyrics, well, too outrageous for your sensibilities. It could be even intellectually stimulating. Ever heard of the "Mozart Effect"?
I won't elaborate much here for now, but here's something that you may have heard somewhere. It's a piece from Edvard Grieg's ballet "Peer Gynt" and it's called "Anitra's Dance". Don't worry I still listen to Nickleback and Usher! If the widget doesn't play automatically just press the play button.
Few people outside of my immediate family know that I listen to classical music. Yeah, right, I mean people with strange names like Mozart and Beethoven and Bach! A lot of people out there might think that this kind of thing is for the old folks, but hey, it's good music, and it's not dead, since a lot of movies and even anime use classical music in their soundtracks.
It can be quite relaxing to listen to after you've been loaded with pop and Rnb and all that. Especially when you find the lyrics, well, too outrageous for your sensibilities. It could be even intellectually stimulating. Ever heard of the "Mozart Effect"?
I won't elaborate much here for now, but here's something that you may have heard somewhere. It's a piece from Edvard Grieg's ballet "Peer Gynt" and it's called "Anitra's Dance". Don't worry I still listen to Nickleback and Usher! If the widget doesn't play automatically just press the play button.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
For A Limited Time Only...
I decided to let my readers see what I look like. This snap was taken last year and if you don't believe I'm 27 now you better pinch yourself.
No I'm not advertising myself. It's just that I decided to go a little bit offbeat. This pic will stay for a few days and after that it's back to the default coral beads that you are all so familiar with.
Happy Holidays people!
No I'm not advertising myself. It's just that I decided to go a little bit offbeat. This pic will stay for a few days and after that it's back to the default coral beads that you are all so familiar with.
Happy Holidays people!
December Break Ennui
It's my second day of my December break. I know I should be glad but I'm admitting that I am not liking this. I'm wishing that it's January, ha ha ha ha!
Today I decided to eat out at one of my favorite places with my work pals. We expected a full house at lunchtime,but the snap above shows that it's deserted. Strange. On normal days the place is so full you'd have to wait for a table or even a seat.
I got to find something solid to do or else I'll get a case of Vacation ennui.
Friday, December 19, 2008
December.......
December is here again...
I'm going to have a break from work that will last almost 2 weeks. The next question is...what will I do? and what will I do first?
I could clean up my room (which is a veritable disaster area because of stacks of books and papers), or maybe I could do some wardrobe overhauling and dump clothes I haven't worn in years,or I could change the linoleum in my room floor.
I could take my little brother out to lunch or pay my paternal grandmother a long-postponed visit. Maybe I could get my laptop some nice extras like headphones...
Maybe I should do a bit of book-shopping, since it's been a long since I bought a book. Perhaps I should spend some time cooking macaroni and cheese,baked spaghetti or chicken curry since it's been a while since I cooked something special.
Too many plans. Maybe two weeks isn't enough.
I'm going to have a break from work that will last almost 2 weeks. The next question is...what will I do? and what will I do first?
I could clean up my room (which is a veritable disaster area because of stacks of books and papers), or maybe I could do some wardrobe overhauling and dump clothes I haven't worn in years,or I could change the linoleum in my room floor.
I could take my little brother out to lunch or pay my paternal grandmother a long-postponed visit. Maybe I could get my laptop some nice extras like headphones...
Maybe I should do a bit of book-shopping, since it's been a long since I bought a book. Perhaps I should spend some time cooking macaroni and cheese,baked spaghetti or chicken curry since it's been a while since I cooked something special.
Too many plans. Maybe two weeks isn't enough.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
How to get hitched to a guy/girl you want, local style
Hning posted something about the ways that Saudi people date...well I couldn't help nodding with her in agreement, since I was in Saudi Arabia for 8 years.
I am tempted to come up with something similar, although it's not about dating. It's about how to get hooked to a guy or girl a person wants here in my society.
Here where I live, marriages are traditionally arranged and two times out of three one gets married to a relative (READ: FIRST/SECOND COUSIN). Once a family here chooses a guy or gal for their kid, it's already a commitment. It happens, no matter how educated the family. The only exceptions are souls like me whose parents got married out of their own choice.
If a guy or girl gets betrothed to a person of his/her parents' choosing, it's either resignation to the inevitable or the getting of a girlfriend or boyfriend to show rebellion. Lots of kids here resort to the second option.
Here in my place, it's taboo for an unmarried person (especially a teenager) to be seen in public with a member of the opposite sex. Why? Because that would somehow mean the end of a planned "brilliant" match with somebody from a family of bigwigs (reputation IS a family thing here) or that would mean that the girl's virtue had already been compromised (we still live in the Middle Ages, hahahaha). However, if they want to end up with that gf or bf, being seen together or having proof of having such a relationship is a way of attaining that end.
Ok, so let's have a rundown on how the kids here who want to be married to a boyfriend or girlfriend get to be seen together by nosey relatives who will report to the parents :
1.Choose a very public with lots of people. The more relatives to be seen there, the better. The fish market can be a likely place, since what the kids will be doing will be fishy anyway!
2.Make out somewhere where you can be seen by people. The university where I work
in has lots of fields where lovers work all sorts of miracles. If they get caught or the girl gets pregnant, so much the better.
3.Ride in a car together, just the both of them! If an aunt or uncle sees the both of them in a car, the better.
4.Eating outside? The next city is a good place. The fact that they chose the destination will make them appear as if they ran away so they wouldn't be easily caught.
5.Hold hands in public! This is a tried and tested publicity stunt here. It works!
6.Get caught in the act of having a tryst!
7.Leave the cellphone at home, and make sure the gf's or bf's messages are all there for the family's prying eyes to read!
8.If all else fails, ELOPE and make sure the neighbors see what's going on! By the way, most of the time, neighbors here are RELATIVES.
Once seen or caught, the guy and the gal only have to wait for their families to get together to arrange the marriage of two young people who have compromised their families' honor and reputation. It's wedding bells for the two!
I am tempted to come up with something similar, although it's not about dating. It's about how to get hooked to a guy or girl a person wants here in my society.
Here where I live, marriages are traditionally arranged and two times out of three one gets married to a relative (READ: FIRST/SECOND COUSIN). Once a family here chooses a guy or gal for their kid, it's already a commitment. It happens, no matter how educated the family. The only exceptions are souls like me whose parents got married out of their own choice.
If a guy or girl gets betrothed to a person of his/her parents' choosing, it's either resignation to the inevitable or the getting of a girlfriend or boyfriend to show rebellion. Lots of kids here resort to the second option.
Here in my place, it's taboo for an unmarried person (especially a teenager) to be seen in public with a member of the opposite sex. Why? Because that would somehow mean the end of a planned "brilliant" match with somebody from a family of bigwigs (reputation IS a family thing here) or that would mean that the girl's virtue had already been compromised (we still live in the Middle Ages, hahahaha). However, if they want to end up with that gf or bf, being seen together or having proof of having such a relationship is a way of attaining that end.
Ok, so let's have a rundown on how the kids here who want to be married to a boyfriend or girlfriend get to be seen together by nosey relatives who will report to the parents :
1.Choose a very public with lots of people. The more relatives to be seen there, the better. The fish market can be a likely place, since what the kids will be doing will be fishy anyway!
2.Make out somewhere where you can be seen by people. The university where I work
in has lots of fields where lovers work all sorts of miracles. If they get caught or the girl gets pregnant, so much the better.
3.Ride in a car together, just the both of them! If an aunt or uncle sees the both of them in a car, the better.
4.Eating outside? The next city is a good place. The fact that they chose the destination will make them appear as if they ran away so they wouldn't be easily caught.
5.Hold hands in public! This is a tried and tested publicity stunt here. It works!
6.Get caught in the act of having a tryst!
7.Leave the cellphone at home, and make sure the gf's or bf's messages are all there for the family's prying eyes to read!
8.If all else fails, ELOPE and make sure the neighbors see what's going on! By the way, most of the time, neighbors here are RELATIVES.
Once seen or caught, the guy and the gal only have to wait for their families to get together to arrange the marriage of two young people who have compromised their families' honor and reputation. It's wedding bells for the two!
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Happy (?) Eid
Here I am in front of the laptop trying to crank out a post. Yeah, Eid Al Adha is tomorrow and I still somehow don't feel the thrill of the season. Maybe I've outgrown my enthusiasm for celebrating holidays like this.
When people were still kids they were thrilled at the prospect of holidays when they could dress up, go visiting, eat yummy food and gorge on sweets or better yet, get gifts from parents and relatives.
Now when these kids grow up, they'll find that it takes time, money, effort, and some cooking skills to put out a decent celebration. It's not really that fun anymore when you're the one cooking the food, or figuring out how to buy tons of gifts on a shoestring for the kids, or re-arranging the furniture, or finding the time to have an Eid party at the house when they have a tight work schedule.
Don't get me wrong, I know how important Eid is, but in our world today when everyone is hard to catch even for a decent conversation,when financial strain is more of the rule rather than the exception, when a lot of people are on the verge of losing faith over the world today, it seems that many of us here will somehow treat it again as a mere date to be crossed off the calendar.
Since my family is a busy one, an Eid Al Adha bash isn't in order. Maybe a simple family meal after the prayers will be enough. Speaking of prayers, I'm sure many of us will be praying for better times to come, when people will get to their senses and stop hurting one another and ruining one another's lives, when even the poor will have something on their tables, and so on and so forth. Perhaps, when that time comes, I will be enthusiastic about holidays again.
When people were still kids they were thrilled at the prospect of holidays when they could dress up, go visiting, eat yummy food and gorge on sweets or better yet, get gifts from parents and relatives.
Now when these kids grow up, they'll find that it takes time, money, effort, and some cooking skills to put out a decent celebration. It's not really that fun anymore when you're the one cooking the food, or figuring out how to buy tons of gifts on a shoestring for the kids, or re-arranging the furniture, or finding the time to have an Eid party at the house when they have a tight work schedule.
Don't get me wrong, I know how important Eid is, but in our world today when everyone is hard to catch even for a decent conversation,when financial strain is more of the rule rather than the exception, when a lot of people are on the verge of losing faith over the world today, it seems that many of us here will somehow treat it again as a mere date to be crossed off the calendar.
Since my family is a busy one, an Eid Al Adha bash isn't in order. Maybe a simple family meal after the prayers will be enough. Speaking of prayers, I'm sure many of us will be praying for better times to come, when people will get to their senses and stop hurting one another and ruining one another's lives, when even the poor will have something on their tables, and so on and so forth. Perhaps, when that time comes, I will be enthusiastic about holidays again.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Tired...
It's only Thursday and yet I feel that the weekend had to be a few days ago...I came to work on a Tuesday feeling it was already Friday. Arggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's that time of year when you don't want to get out of bed since the morning fog hasn't settled yet and the sun isn't shining yet. Time when I know my class is at 7 AM and the morning commute is around 30 minutes and yet I stay in bed till 6! Time when I feel tired even after one class...
My superiors say I'm getting second semester burn-out. Maybe they're right. But that doesn't necessarily mean I'm hating my job. I know stress is an occupational hazard for this profession, and I guess I had more than my share this time. Not even a good sleep could energize me, and don't get me wrong, I try to stay on a balanced diet and lots of water.
I better stop here and let me get a few hours of sleep...
It's that time of year when you don't want to get out of bed since the morning fog hasn't settled yet and the sun isn't shining yet. Time when I know my class is at 7 AM and the morning commute is around 30 minutes and yet I stay in bed till 6! Time when I feel tired even after one class...
My superiors say I'm getting second semester burn-out. Maybe they're right. But that doesn't necessarily mean I'm hating my job. I know stress is an occupational hazard for this profession, and I guess I had more than my share this time. Not even a good sleep could energize me, and don't get me wrong, I try to stay on a balanced diet and lots of water.
I better stop here and let me get a few hours of sleep...
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